Online Sexuality

Four Views on the Transformation of Kink through the Internet by Lisa

As a child, I was always intrigued by the idea of bondage, although‍ I didn’t fully understand what it ‍meant or that‍ it was part of a broader category known ⁤as “kink“. ‍My first introduction to this world came during my college years, when I ⁤met my first dominant partner on the ⁢gay dating app, Scruff. His profile was clear: he was interested in tattoos, kink,⁤ and ‍slim ⁤men. As a slim man with tattoos, I fit his description.

During our initial encounter, ⁢he asked me if I⁣ was familiar with kink. My response must have been unsatisfactory, as he immediately directed me​ to⁤ do ‌some online research. Despite living in a small town in Georgia, he was a well-known ⁤adult film actor ⁣for in San Francisco. He ‍introduced me to my first Folsom Street Fair,⁤ the world’s largest leather event, and gifted​ me my ⁤first‍ harness. Since then, I’ve been⁤ deeply involved in the ‌world of kink, particularly ​fisting​ and flogging. I’m forever ‌grateful for his⁣ guidance, which gave me the language and confidence ⁢to explore this world on my own.

I consider ⁢myself ‍a product of the internet age ⁢in the⁣ realm​ of kink. I‍ never had ⁢to seek approval from a bouncer to enter a BDSM club, nor ⁣did⁤ I⁣ have to dial a ⁤number from the back of a leather magazine, as was common in the ‌past. The internet has been my ⁣gateway,⁣ providing me with an abundance of information and‌ access that ‌has⁣ transformed the kink culture. It has brought us together in unprecedented ⁣ways, while also introducing new issues and challenges. As⁢ we increasingly rely on digital ⁤spaces, the⁢ threat of misguided censorship looms large.

We spoke with four queer individuals about their⁣ experiences with digital kink and how the internet has reshaped the‌ scene, both positively and negatively.

‘The internet, despite its many benefits, can also be a breeding ground for bullies’

Andrew Gurza, ‌disability awareness consultant, Toronto (he/him)

I’m a leather‍ enthusiast and I’m also into pup play.⁢ Additionally, I’m⁢ disabled.

The internet has enabled me to merge my disabled ⁢life with my kink life in exciting ways, but it has also highlighted the ableism within ‍our community. ‍I can express ​my kinky self online, in my​ wheelchair, wearing leathers or a ‌pup mask, to an audience I wouldn’t have reached otherwise. However, the anonymity of the ⁤internet ⁢also means that people can make ableist remarks or⁤ cruel comments without facing any repercussions. Despite its⁤ many benefits, the internet can also be‌ a breeding ground ​for bullies.

Nevertheless, the internet remains crucial. I often can’t attend in-person kink events due to accessibility issues, a problem that is seldom discussed. There are ⁢many disabled kinksters ⁢online who‌ face similar challenges. The internet provides them with ​a platform ⁤to participate and connect ⁤with ⁢the community.

Lloyd⁣ Alexander-Winston MacDonald III, fisting top in​ San Diego (he/him)

At 19, I began visiting bathhouses and sex clubs in LA. During one of ‍these visits, I stumbled upon a⁤ fisting video titled “Acres of​ Ass” in a leather⁤ store. It was incredibly arousing. A few years later, I met a man who commented on the size of my hands and taught me how to fist⁤ him. That⁢ was my first experience with​ fisting. ​Nowadays,⁣ people discover fisting through online porn, not ‍in video or leather stores. The internet provides‍ unlimited access to⁣ fisting videos for anyone with an ​internet connection.

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