After Lockdown, It’s Okay to Have Absolutely No Desire to Date by Lisa
As we gradually transition from the lockdown phase, adjusting to the new normal, it’s undeniable that things have evolved. We are not the same people we were before the pandemic, and it might take a while for us to fully adapt to the post-lockdown world. The concept of “normal” has become fluid, and our pre-pandemic identities might not align with the realities of our post-pandemic world.
The lockdown period has been a time of introspection for many, often unintentionally. When the world comes to a standstill and the liberties we once enjoyed vanish, we are compelled to reassess our lives. Questions about our role in the world, the need for change, and our priorities become more prominent. One of the first aspects to be scrutinized during such times is our relationships. A recent study by dating site eharmony, in collaboration with relationship support provider Relate, revealed that half of all couples realized during lockdown that they wanted to spend their lives with their partners. This is a significant achievement, considering the challenges of being confined with your partner, dealing with their work calls, and navigating domestic disputes. However, for some couples, the lockdown has been a catalyst for ending their relationship, with one in five couples planning to separate once the world reopens.
As these soon-to-be singles prepare to reenter the dating scene, many single individuals are eager to leave it. A fifth of men are keen to establish a post-lockdown relationship as soon as possible. The pandemic’s fear and uncertainty have hit single people the hardest, and social distancing measures have made it even more challenging to find a partner. The casual approach of “let’s see how it goes” is becoming increasingly difficult to maintain.
However, not all singles are desperate to find a partner. Almost a third of singles used the lockdown period to introspect and realized that they didn’t need a partner to feel complete. According to eharmony’s relationships expert Rachael Lloyd, many men deciding to stay single and not constantly seeking a partner can be beneficial for their mental health and the overall dating pool. “Before lockdown, we were in a casual dating world,” she says. “The advent of free dating apps from 2012 onwards led to a culture of turbo dating, where people felt pressured to be dating all the time.” However, the pandemic is likely to slow down this trend. “There’ll be a slower dating culture – less choice, less supply. It’s time to really think about the kind of person you’re best suited to,” she adds.
