Do I need to reveal my vaccination status to the person I’m dating?
Embarking on a date can often feel like a performance. You aim to highlight your positive attributes without appearing boastful, while downplaying the mundane aspects of your life without seeming secretive. It’s a delicate dance of self-promotion, all in the hopes of securing a lasting connection or at least a fleeting, gratifying boost of validation. The topic of health usually doesn’t surface unless there’s a compelling reason to discuss it.
However, the pandemic has shifted this dynamic. While not everyone has contracted Covid, we’ve all been affected by its presence since early 2020. This is particularly pertinent in the dating scene, as the virus can be transmitted through close physical contact – something that’s often hoped for if a date goes well. It’s been a challenging year for single individuals, but the vaccine rollout offers a glimmer of hope, allowing them to cautiously re-enter the dating scene, which now seems as refreshing as Venice’s canals after a year devoid of inebriated retirees on massive cruise ships.
The issue is, not everyone has received the vaccine yet. At the time of writing, individuals in their late thirties were being called to get their first dose. Regardless of your stance on the vaccine, the pandemic, or the government’s handling of the situation, science indicates that the safest way to coexist with Covid-19 is for as many people as possible to get vaccinated. However, some eligible individuals have opted not to. While there’s been discussion about vaccine passports for certain services once the country fully reopens, there’s no mandate that prohibits dating until you’ve been vaccinated. But how do you determine if your potential date has been vaccinated, and would it influence your decision to date them?
On the surface, it seems straightforward: ask your potential date about their vaccination status – fully vaccinated, partially vaccinated (awaiting the second dose), or not vaccinated at all – and then make your decision. But it’s not that simple. When do you ask? Before meeting? During the first date? Some people might be reluctant to disclose their vaccination status, so do you request proof, like the small blue card often flaunted in post-vaccination Instagram photos? Do you specify in your bio that you’ll only date vaccinated individuals? Does being vaccinated make you more attractive? Are we fostering a dating hierarchy? Any perspective can be misconstrued by someone looking for an argument. What could be the implications?
Regulations hastily implemented during periods of fear and uncertainty often become the standard. We should be cautious about setting precedents, particularly if it means we might be expected to reveal other health conditions upfront. Those vaccinated early could be inadvertently disclosing a medical condition, even if we don’t know the specifics. Some dating apps already have a field for users to disclose their HIV status, which has sparked controversy, with claims that it both combats and perpetuates stigma. We already filter potential dates based on appearance, age, and the dullness of their profile information. It might seem logical to delve deeper into their medical history, asking about past and present STIs, drug use, family medical history, and mental health issues. But this implies that someone without any health issues is “cleaner” than others. Is this a notion we want to encourage?